Getting a Lemon Lobbed at Your Junk Is Not a Good Way to Start the New Year
This morning, I was laying in the hotel room bed while Anthony was attempting to juggle with three lemons. (He wasn't doing it well.) At one point he threw one to me while I wasn't paying attention and it smacked me right in my balls.Goddamn, I have not been hit in the balls in probably 20 years and had forgotten how much it hurts.
Like, indescribable, mind and soul-numbing pain.
As I lay writhing in agony I remember thinking that my balls would never be the same again. As soon as I felt like I could stand I hurried to the bathroom to throw up.
I have high hopes for 2011. But this is so not the way I wanted it to start.
(Ed. note: OK, the above is a lie. But I needed write something because nobody else is saying anything about Giant Butters, due largely in part to the fact that nobody else knows this blog exists.)
Giant Butters FAQ:
1.) Who are you, Giant Butters?
You can call me Butters. Only my parents call me by my full name.
Oooh, yes! The nut-shot throw up! That's a bad one.
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